If you give a drunk investigator a lesson.... you're going to need popcorn to go with it.

-The Drunk Investigator-

Something you should know is that Hermana Reeve and I are quite sly and ingenious. So, consequently, we had devised most excellent plans to get our investigator who has been coming to church weekly a testimony of Joseph Smith and therefore prepare us to teach the Word of Wisdom the next week. This plan was to have him watch 'Jose Smith: profeta de la Restauracion' in the home of a member. This movie works miracles and is typically very successful in helping any and all investigators.

Sometimes you gotta take a selfie on a
 bridge that overlooks Manhattan.

Everything was set up Saturday night and he even lived in the same apartment complex as the member to make things super-fácil. We walked up and knocked on his door. He opened the door, high-fives us and was acting a bit weird and a bit flamboyant. Sister Reeve turned to me and asked in an undertone, "do you think he's drunk...?"

"I don't know," I replied, "sometimes he just kind of acts odd." So we continued on with our plan and he and his mother (a permigator/eternagator) followed us up to my favorite members. We walked in and he was excited but not too crazy.

As the movie began all was well. He made an occasional commentary. However, fifteen minutes in we started to get a narration by said investigator of all that was happening. And, well, it was a quite drunk narration. It began to disrupt the environment quite a bit and unfortunately the elders were there with their top investigator as well, so he was distracted by the comments. Popcorn was spilt, very inappropriate comments were made, and we were mortified once we noticed that we did, in fact, bring a drunk investigator to a member's house. Eep.

After much travail and helpless laughter at both the comments and the situation, we got him out, feeling humiliated and humbled. The Elders even helped us out and didn't let him get onto the elevator alone with us. We originally got on with his mom (he was standing with the Elders) and the Elders said, "yeah, there's not enough room for all of us, we'll take the next one."

We were like, "bye! See you all at the bottom!" But then our drunk investigator slid on last second and the Elders took one for the team and came on with us saying, "just kidding, for a second there I thought there wasn't enough room, but looks like there is!" I had to turn around so that no one could see me crack up laughing. :P

Our reactions to the drunk investigator...

Everyone took it well, though, the members included and we all laughed until our abs were rock hard. And, we think this will work to the investigator's advantage once he hears the Word of Wisdom. Hopefully he will feel humbled by the experience (if he remembers it...) and won't even want to drink or smoke anymore! :D All things will work together for good!

-How were we shafted this week?-

By the Assistants this week (yes, I am looking at you Elder Weisler and Elder Brown). We tend to plan our transfers in advance with meetings, exchanges, etc. So this last week everything was perfectly in order and we slept soundly Sunday night knowing that Labor Day was a work day, Tuesday was Mission Leadership Council, Wednesday was preparation Day, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday we had exchanges (back-to-back), and church was on Sunday. On Monday morning I awoke and looked at my phone to see a text sent at 10:28pm the night before. It read:

"Hola! We have to call an audible due to a schedule change with the Stake Conferences coming up. Mission Leadership Council will be on Friday instead of Tuesday. Sorry if this affects your exchanges or other meetings. Thanks for being flexible! We will talk more later, let us know if you have any questions.

We are also excited to revamp this group chat soon. Be ready. #TheAgeofaNewBreed

Love you all, have a great night! 🗽"

This kinda sorta ruined everything. But, you know, it was okay... just that we had to cancel two exchanges, had an entirely blank schedule for Tuesday to fill in, had to cancel all our appointments on Friday, move District Meeting, call Elders about District Leader Training Meetings being moved, and needed to reschedule our week.

But, it taught me several things. First of all, what an audible was. I had no idea, but my basketball-savvy companion knows sports so she told me. That was very kind. Also, it taught me how to drop everything and accommodate to sudden changes. I loved it! It was actually quite exciting. And stressful. But I felt accomplished after everything was re-organized within the day.

The Book of Mormon IS the cure!

-The Dirty Elevator-

Background: A month ago Sister Platt and I went down the elevator while a cleaner was cleaning it and he was complaining about how dirty it got. "But sir," we said, "you wouldn't have a job if we didn't make it dirty!" He conceded and allowed us to put our entire handprint on the wall before he proceeded to clean.

*Us going down elevator by ourselves at 9am on Thursday.* me: *stretches in elevator to illustrate a funny story that happened and accidentally leaves a footprint on the wall.* *elevator stops at floor three and we are suddenly very composed and polite Sister missionaries.* *Workman and three friends get in.*

Workman: "people have NO respect for where they live! Do you see this?? People have NO respect." *points at my footprint and exasperatedly sighs.*

Sister Reeve: "Didn't... you do that Sister Voss?" *I nod*

Workman: "NO! Not you. Other people. I swear people have zero respect for where they live! Dang people in New York." *rolls eyes and makes fist.*

Me: *mortifiedly looks straight forward with a resolve to repent and tries not to laugh but fails.*

-Random items of business-

President Quote from Mega-Zone: "When you're 64 you can't even actually remember that you're 65!"

Also at Mega-Zone I had to give three workshops with Sister Reeve. It went well. But it was three very long hours.

We had exchanges with Sisters Barney and Persinger and had so many blessings and saw so many miracles.

I ate Pupusas again!!!! On exchanges with Sister Barney. They were

SO good. ❤️

-Spiritual Part-

I FINISHED THE BOOK OF MORMON THIS WEEK! Again. :) And I am going to start another one in Spanish highlighting the three pillars of eternity. The Creation, The Fall, and The Atonement.

"It was required, indeed it was central to the significance of the Atonement, that this perfect Son who had never spoken ill nor done wrong nor touched an unclean thing had to know how the rest of humankind--us, all of us--would feel when we did commit such sins. For His Atonement to be infinite and eternal, He had to feel what it was like to die not only physically but spiritually, to sense what it was like to have the divine Spirit withdraw, leaving one feeling totally, abjectly, hopelessly alone." -Elder Jeffrey R. Holland.

I know that our Savior suffered all things for us that we might not suffer. That we could have happiness and joy in returning to live with him one day. I have a testimony or Him and I love Him.

Hope your week is less crazy than mine!

Hermana Ally Voss